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OJ Outta Control Again

Way back when the world was less populated and I was younger and more impulsive and drove around in hot rod Fords, I’d occasionally break the law by exceeding the speed limits on the roadways. Okay, I did it a whole lot when I was younger and more impulsive.

Every now and then, the po-po would pull me over to issue a rather large citation and invite me to make a substantial contribution to whatever county’s jurisdiction I was in.

I recall two distinctive after effects of being pulled over and ticketed for speeding: A) for a good period of time after the tickets and courtroom visits to unsympathetic, mostly deaf municipal judges, I would absolutely quell my need for speed and not impulsively blast down the roadways with the pedal to the metal like Neal Cassady madly driving crosscountry in On The Road and B) at some point, I gained a tad of maturity and no longer put my own or others’ lives in danger and simply didn’t break the traffic speed laws. I grew up and slowed down.

OJ Simpson
Pool, Getty Images. OJ now banned from Las Vegas hotel.

Not everyone does either after being caught outside the law and exposed to correctional action, such as our favorite Heisman Trophy winner cum criminal, OJ Simpson.

Recall in July he assured the Nevada parole board he was “really a good guy” and regaled them with stories of how he’d matured, slowed down, and had served mankind by helping many other fellow jailbirds learn to recognize and control their own violent impulses during his nine-year incarceration. Recall he pled with the parole board that he wanted to spend time with his children and grandchildren, and assured everyone he had a friend in Florida with whom he could couch surf and stay out of trouble while he re-established these treasured familial bonds.

Now it comes to light that, in some five weeks he’s been free, he’s seemingly neither slowed down nor matured.

Where you and I would maybe use better judgment and likely near vanish from the face of the earth, Orenthal James has chosen to spend his time in Las Vegas going from bar to bar nightly, according to TMZ, and had to finally be banned from the Cosmopolitan Hotel for good after becoming boozy, unruly, and disruptive and getting physical and breaking glasses inside the Clique bar at the hotel.

Security was called Wednesday night after OJ became upset with other workers, and the officers escorted him from the bar. The hotel’s managers banned him shortly after.

Simpson is so far on a five year supervised parole from the Nevada Department of Corrections.

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