Contact Us

Top 5 Things to Do With All the Extra Hours of Sunlight on the Summer Solstice

Summer solstice!
Getty Images

Today is the summer solstice — the longest day of the year in the northern hemisphere. Today, we’ll have more hours of light than on any other day this year. You simply cannot waste a great opportunity like this! Soak up the rays and use that extra sunlight wisely, my friend. Here are my top five suggestions:

Getty Images
Getty Images


Mess with a Vampire



You have to figure that your typical vampire has to use an alarm clock to wake up. I mean, he can’t just wait until that first warm beam of sunlight comes shooting through the windows, right? His windows are going to be blacked out. The summer solstice is a great time to tease your local vampire with the false promise of an easy breakfast. He’ll come to the door all excited, but uh-oh the sun hasn’t gone down yet! Poof – no more vampire. You’ll thank me later.

Downside – Only works on dumb vampires. And don’t give me that BS about sparkly vampires being able to live in the sunlight, okay? Don’t be stupid – everyone knows sparkly vampires aren’t real. (Also, if he figures out your clever ruse, he’ll just wait until the sun really does go down before eating your entire family.)


Getty Images
Getty Images


Catch Extra Sunlight in a Jar, Sell It on Winter Solstice



The summer solstice is the longest day of the year, while the winter solstice is the shortest. I say make hay while the sun shines, dude. Capture some of that wonderful summer sun and then sell it in the winter time when everyone really needs it.

Downside – Sunlight has a really quick expiration date. Nothing’s worse than opening a jar of rotten sunshine. Don’t skimp with cheap jars.


Getty Images
Getty Images


Charge Your Solar Batteries for the Zombie Apocalypse



This one’s similar to No. 2, but seems more and more realistic with every passing news cycle. Dust off that solar panel and top off all the batteries you keep in your underground bunker. (You have an underground bunker, right?)

Downside — Do not keep your batteries too close to your collection of goalie masks to protect against leakage. (What do you mean, “Why goalie masks?” How else are you going to protect yourself from the face-eaters? Do I have to do everything for you?)


Getty Images
Getty Images


Get Magnifying Glass, Kill Every Ant That Ever Lived



Some people think that killing ants with a magnifying glass is cruel. Those people have never fallen face-first into an ant pile, I’m thinking. Today, revenge is yours. When you’re done with your bloody rampage, people will call them ‘fire ants’ for a different reason. MuuAHAHA! AHAHAHAH!

Downside – Killing ants with a magnifying glass IS cruel. It’s between you and your God, buddy.


Getty Images
Getty Images


Sleep Through It



More sunlight? Gah, that’s annoying! What is this, the Arctic Circle? How much more daylight do we really need in one day? How am I ever going to get through all these Bon Iver CDs and write my deep, dark poetry? And where’s my eyeliner, dammit? This day sucks … like, more than the others.

Downside – Someone might think it’s time for an intervention. Weigh your options, emo boy.


Best of Classic Rock 92.1

Recommended For You

Best of the Web

Leave a Comment

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing VIP profile. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to using your original account information.

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

(Forgot your password?)

Not a member? Sign up here

Sign up for Club 921 quickly by connecting your Facebook account. It's just as secure and no password to remember!

Sign up to have exclusive SWLA Classic Rock 92.1 contests, events, coupons, presales, and much more delivered to you for FREE.